Those of you who know me well know I’ve had a tough summer. For a long time now I’d planned to go straight into graduate school after college, and when I wasn’t accepted to any of the schools I applied to (except one, but with no funding), it was very difficult for me to come to terms with my situation.
I felt, besides being hurt, angry. It seemed to me that I had suffered a great injustice. I had worked hard. I had gotten good grades. I had taken the classes I needed to take. I deserved to be in graduate school.
Deserved. What a funny word. Who ever said anyone deserved anything? Who are we to judge that? Even in what I perceived as my misfortune, I was blessed. I had a place to live, even if it did mean moving back in with my parents. And even though I hadn’t been able to find a full-time teaching job, I was able to get a part-time job as a tutor, and another part-time job doing social media and marketing. I was aware of this, and yet my hurt at not having gotten into graduate school left me unable to acknowledge my blessings.
But now I can. It’s still hard, but I’ve finally gotten out of the mindset that I’ve suffered an injustice. I can be hurt and disappointed, yes, but I have no right to angry. Not when I hear every day about another person losing their job, or struggling to make ends meet. I’m blessed. Very, very blessed. And for that, I am thankful.